confused...

i think i've had enough of surprising news this day. and seeing my EX this afternoon is too much. and i don't even know why his presence still affects me!!!! aargh! i just hate this feeling... any help?

first news...
my seatmate told me that he has already a new girl. and i couldn't care less about it. but of course, it's natural to us girls to be curious about our ex' new apple of his eyes.... right? tell me puh-leez... and she also said that im much prettier than that 'new girl'... haha! at least that's a consolation... hehehe! but she didn't say that just because we're friends, did she? hmm... anyway, if i couldn't care less about that news, why do i feel something, should i say, very hurt? is it because i still feel something for him? or was it just my ego because he found his 'new' first?
*confused* *confused* *confused*

second news...
he's still here on our town... i really thought that he was already at cebu to start his first day in college. but another friend told me that he was driving their car [his grandfather is our school principal]. and again, i couldn't care less! but then, why do i feel excited on seeing him? is it because i miss him and that i still love him? or i just feel really pretty about myself that i want him to regret about our breakup? i'd like to agree with the latter, but then....
*confused* *confused* *confused*

third news...
i've seen him after class. he was again, driving their car to get his lolo... actually, i didn't see him. i don't want to look at him coz he might think i still have feelings for him. and if you're asking if he saw me, well, i don't know also. maybe yes, maybe not. and i want to hit myself for feeling so sorry in not seeing him.
*confused* *confused* *confused*

what's wrong with me?!?! i don't love him anymore, do i? or was i just feeling too paranoid to think that he's still feels something for me and that i was acting like i don't like him anymore? i mean, c'mon! he already has a new one! my friend even told me that maybe he was just using her as his 'panakip butas' but heck.... i don't think he's that kind of guy... for at least five months, i discovered the real him and i don't think he's like that. and my last question is, WHY AM I STILL WRITTING THESE THINGS IF I SAID COULDN'T CARE LESS ABOUT HIM?!?!?!?!?!?!
*confused* *confused* *confused*